POSTS FOR 2015

I’m bad at pet names

Family Life108 words1 minutes to read

I have a new girlfriend, and she seems to have an affinity for pet names. Me, I’m not so good at them, but at least I try hard.

My love, @red_sauce44

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She says it’s an adorable part of my geeky charm. I can live with that.

Cereal

Her: Hey honey bun! How are you?

Me: Look at you… honey bunches of oats!

Breakfast pastries

Her: Could you do me a favor, love muffin?

Me: Sure thing, my little… um… sex bagel.

Hentai

Her: Good morning, love bug.

Me: Good morning my… um… lusty tentacle…

Ryan Parman

Ryan Parman is an experienced software engineer, open source evangelist, and passionate user advocate currently living in Seattle. He is the creator of and , and worked on DevOps and Security at . He is now bringing learning into the digital age as an Engineering Lead and Site Reliability Engineer at . Ryan's aptly-named blog, , is where he writes about ideas longer than .